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4 months agoGusto posted 🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Rangers FC announce their new formation – the 4-4-WOKE. Instead of tackling on the pitch, they’re tackling you for not clapping hard enough.
🎵 You put the woke sh*t in, you take the loyal fans out,
You dive in the box and then you roll around,
That’s what it’s all about! 🎵
Rangers FC – once a proud football club, now a full-time diversity seminar with a side gig in kicking a ball around. Forget tactics, forget trophies, forget even pretending to care about the fans. The “real” priority these days? Policing your thoughts harder than a steward at the turnstiles confiscating your contraband sausage roll.
You see, tackling opponents on the pitch is old-school, boring! In 2025, Rangers is all about tackling YOU: your beliefs, your traditions, and your silly little outdated idea that football is just about, you know… football. If your grandad fought in the war to preserve British values, congratulations! Rangers is here to tell you that those values are exclusionary, outdated, and probably a hate crime.
And if you don’t like it? Well, “Rangers is not the club for you.” That’s right—clear out, pleb! No room for you unless you’re ready to do knee slides into a safe space while chanting “Diversity is our strength” with the enthusiasm of a North Korean military parade.
So don’t bother complaining about matchday costs, soulless ownership, or the team bottling it in the big moments. Shut up, buy the overpriced virtue-signaling merch, and remember:
Football is temporary. Social justice is forever!